The Manliness of Home Management

While not drinking coffee , I started on a ketogenic diet to try to boost my energy. This switched over to a cyclical ketogenic diet after I had lost about 20 pounds because I didn't want to look like a stick, or have the physique of Gollum. I also cut my workouts down to twice a week, then once a week (morning walk and my pitiful attempts at playing sports not included ). Amazingly I had better results on this plan than when I was working out 5 days a week. The diet was surely a factor. Still I couldn't help wondering that if I did better NOT working out everyday, what other things would be best to make into a once weekly activity ?

( "shower and brush teeth"was not one of them)

Besides all that , having a perfect repeating daily schedule sounded heavenly until we actually pulled it off. Then it became clear why "every day is exactly the same" was a fitting title of a depressing NIN song instead of an inspirational book. Maybe it is necessary to have time to withdraw from an activity and then anticipate it again to get the most out of it. To be sure, I like all my hobbies and my little responsibilities - I even like organizing things for some reason. But these aren't things I can live for every single day and still find enjoyable. And I want to enjoy them. I like sex but even that's gonna turn into a job if I try to do it daily for the rest of my life.

Having a focus for each day we can dive into deep, thats the plan for now.  As I said in an earlier post, I realize this is the small stuff of life. The great thing about working on this stuff together is that it gives us a game plan for our days and how we will spend out time as a family. Even if we're not the best team, at least we're on the same team. 

I haven't written for quite a while, probably because I stopped drinking coffee for a few months. Originally I thought I had a lot of natural energy and drive, but it turned out to be caffeine. The lack of anxiety I felt was nice, but the lack of motivation to do almost anything but sleep was not. It made me realize that a lot of things had been artificially propped up by my excess nervous energy. The pointlessness of having a meticulously cleaned apartment and organized minute by minute schedule became depressing.  Did it really make the difference I believed it would for myself and my family? 

I have started drinking coffee again ( probably why I'm writing) and still believe in the merits of an organized life and space . But given the perspective I've gained, I can't get all excited about it like I used too.

I feel now like I am focusing more on relationships than before. Building a strong relationship may be Intangible , but it's no less real than building a custom car , home organizing routine , or clean environment. It's actually a lot similar in that if you take leave of the upkeep they all rust and breakdown and fall apart. I guess I used to think that things were better than relationships because you have control over them and can touch and see them. But relationships are just as real; probably more real.